It’s easy, it’s quick, and it’s free: pouring river water in your socks.
Fortunately, there are other possible criteria.

Exactly. In a sence that it happened once, wasn’t really significant, but people making it out to be some kind of catastrophe instead of a pretty regular not very newsworthy event

Popularity give them followers, followers give them money

You don’t need to “learn how to program”, whatever the fuck you mean by that, to interface with texting terminal. We’re interfacing via text right now and you seem to do it just fine, you don’t seem to need a selection of colourful boxes to understand what I am saying

Schemas are a nightmare to work with, and are totally unreadable

What did John Lemmy, famous CEO of Lemmy, did this time?

Off hours can’t be 6 times cheaper, surely